Ulta is very much a do-it-yourself type of place. Unlike the department store cosmetics counters or fancy-pants boutiques I visited before, which carry high-end custom products, there are no helpful sales people or cheerful demonstration areas at Ulta. It's pretty much all business. If you go in knowing exactly what you want, you'll have no trouble finding it once you locate the proper aisle. If you're like me, however, and you have absolutely no freaking idea what you're doing, you will soon be reduced to a quivering mass by the impenetrable walls of color and texture. Do you want powder shadow or cream? Is liner pencil better than liquid? What are the season's hottest looks and why?

All of the displays seemed to be selling the same thing. I had no way to make an informed decision about which product was superior. It's somewhat unsettling to think that I picked out materials that will be used around my eyes, nose and mouth more or less at random. I mean, I picked them at random, not that they'll be used at random. Or, well, actually both. I guess what I'm saying is, in this situation I could've used a little hand-holding.

Still, I think I acquitted myself rather well. I managed to snag nine different colors of eyeshadow, two blushes, a bottle of foundation, a pair of lipsticks, a cheek brush and a finishing brush for under $40. All of these items are sitting neatly on my bathroom counter, still in their packaging because I have absolutely no idea how to deploy them in service of my face. But hey, they were a bargain!