By Moe

• MOE'S TAVERN SHOPPER - Building a Mystery
  
• This is a playoff edition of the Moe's Tavern Shopper
  
• In fact, this is the second such edition
  
• Moe's - Not Just a Tavern, But Also a Shopper

The Road Ahead
I think you all know what the playoffs mean to us. It means that with each win we increase the value of our league payment by getting to play more games. It's simple math.

Next Week
Game time is 1:30 p.m. Our opponent, I believe, is Team #8, which is the 7th seed. Or is it Team #7, the 8th seed? We are Team #2, and, coincidentally, the 2nd seed. You may be wondering: Why then don't we play at 2:30 p.m.? Because Mike's Law of Scheduling doesn't work in the complicated world of playoff brackets.

If we play the team I think we do, it's the team we struggled to beat 10-7 in the last regular-season game. There are bad feelings between us and them. Then again, we only had two girls that day. Then again, we will be missing Mike and Michelle Sunday. Not that Mike is a girl. Not that there's anything wrong with being a girl. I personally wouldn't mind being one. If I could still have a girlfriend. Which I don't now anyway, but there's always hope. Then again, hope is killing me.

Super-sub?
A lot of people have been saying to me, "Moe, is it time to bring in the Super- Sub?" And I've been saying, "I don't know. Is it?" I guess it depends on this. Is there anybody out there named Trevor? Because if you're there, and you can guarantee an appearance Sunday, I'd just as soon go with four of us. But if Trevor is in the Far East inspecting his sweatshops, we'll go to the well and bring Tom out of retirement. I just hope we don't get disqualified for playing a non-roster player in the playoffs. That would be kind of a bummer.

As far as the girls go...
I assume we go with the four of you. But as always, it's up to you.

Stats
During the regular season, we outscored our opponents 65-47. If you include our first playoff game, the total is 80-51. Our 5-2 regular season record goes to 6- 2. Interesting stat: Marty has scored one goal while on his ass. I have recorded one assist while on my ass. It was the same play.

Awesome Play
I don't know if you guys remember it, but I made this sweet move around a defender and scored a goal and I was consciously using a move I've seen Mike use many times. It's called: pretend you're going one way, then go the other. It doesn't require fancy stickwork like Mr. Marty Pants.

Baseball
Marty's team sucks.

Motto
From Mister Steer's placemat: "We produce good food at a profit - at a loss if we must - but good food." or something like that.

That is all.